Shooting Myself in the Foot

Sorry that this blog is late. I thought I e-mailed it in, but I just
saved the e-mail as a draft.

Well, I made a big mistake on Monday. I'm not sure how it will affect
my job here at Hogye, but we'll wait and see.

One of my co-workers asked me how I like the school. I didn't know how
to answer, so I avoided the question a little.

"The people are very nice. The school is beautiful. The children are
mostly good."

I didn't tell her the part about not enjoying my day-to-day work here.
Her next question was more to the point.

"How about next year ... do you want to stay here?" she asked.

"Oh god, no!!" I answered too emphatically, almost cutting her off.

She was understandably shocked, and forced me to explain the feelings
I was trying to keep hidden.

"I don't really teach anything here. I don't use my teaching skills. I
worked for many years to improve my teaching skills. If I stay here
for long, I won't be a good teacher any longer."

So she asked me the obvious question.

"Where will you go next?"

"I'll probably work in the area. Maybe Changweon," I answered.

"But another public school will just be the same."

I knew that her reply wasn't correct, because I have friends at other
schools who range from virtually no teaching responsibility to 100%
control over all lessons.

"I probably won't work in public school," I answered in order to make
the conversation simpler.

Gale is pushing me toward university next year. The schedule would be
great, but I like teaching children. Who knows.

UPDATE:
After that conversation, my co-worker gave me a lesson to "help" her
with. I get creative control from top to bottom. The last two days
have been great fun.

Expat Meetings

When I lived in Thailand for many years, I rarely spent time with the expatriates (expats) there. I didn't like to focus on the negatives of living in Thai culture, and groups of expats naturally start talking about everything that annoys them about the culture. Focusing on all that negative stuff all the time leaves many people bitter and angry. I didn't want to be affected like that.

When I first moved to Korea three years ago, I tried to spend my time with Koreans, learning Korean culture and enjoying what it has to offer me. I didn't even know any other expats for the first year and a half. I made friends with many Koreans and kept a fairly busy social life, though I didn't join anyone who asked me to drink on weeknights: I don't drink before work because it affects my performance and that would make me seem unprofessional. Eventually, though, I lost almost all my Korean friends because I'm not Korean and have certain habits or beliefs which come from my western heritage and which aren't accepted by many Koreans. When a Korean would demand that I change my opinion about something and I politely declined, I would generally lose that friend.

Eventually, I got tied into the expat community in Dong Hae. Since EFL teachers are generally a little strange, expat meetings and parties are always very ... interesting. Many of the people we met regularly were either alcoholics or on the road to alcoholism. Some of them had lived in Korea for so long that they no longer spoke English well, but rather spoke a kind of pidgin. The parties would last until dawn and often ended with people passed out in the restaurant, vomiting in the bathroom, or even pissing themselves.

I was kind of happy that Gale and I took some time to stay in Thailand, away from all that. We were able to focus on our goals more than social interaction. We accomplished a lot in the three months we stayed in Thailand.

Now, though, we're back into the expat scene. There's too much drinking. We want to meet our new friends often, but we can't afford to drink so much so regularly. We keep saying that we'll stop drinking so much, but it doesn't seem to happen.

For example, this weekend, we had a party with some friends over. We ate and watched movies until about two a.m. Over the course of the night, we drank several bottles' worth of soju and beer. The next day, we went to a friend's apartment and started drinking at about seven p.m. We didn't stop until seven on Sunday morning.

This is just too much. We can't keep going like this. We have goals and dreams. We don't want to drown them in a pool of Korean liquor.

On Literacy in EFL Situations

I had about five things I wanted to write about this week, but I try to limit myself to one topic per blog entry. Maybe I'll add another one tomorrow on a different subject. The topic for today is literacy and teaching English.

I'm constantly surprised by my students' inability to read English. When my co-worker first told me -- about a month after I started -- that students studied English starting from the third grade but didn't learn to write until the fifth grade, I was shocked (the idiom I want to use is "floored," but I guess you won't know that one). How, I wondered, could third- and fourth-grade students study without writing?

The answer, which came to me the next second, is that of course they don't.

Whoever wrote the national syllabus appears to have tried to follow natural language learning principles, but failed to understand that first and second languages aren't acquired in the same way. Sure, first-language learners learn language long before they learn to write, but that's because the human brain isn't developed enough for literacy at that point. Heck, even a large percentage of boys aren't ready to read and write in second grade. By third grade, however, almost all the dyslexia problems have disappeared and students are increasingly relying on writing as a form of studying and memorization.

As a result, third- and fourth-grade students, whose lives -- especially in Korea -- revolve around studying and literacy, write down what they've learned, but what they've written is in Korean. They have no choice in the matter: the want to write, but the don't have the tools to do it in English. The reliance on the Korean alphabet brings about pronunciation problems. I suspect that whoever planned the syllabus this way did so precisely to solve speaking and pronunciation problems. Sadly, his or her choice led to exactly the opposite result -- students whose pronunciation is awful.

Sure, I've taught straight listening and speaking without literacy, but the target audience was of pre-K to kindergarten age, when the brain isn't ready to accept literacy-based teaching. Any student who is learning to read and write in his or her native language in school is prepared to learn to read and write in English. In fact, by third or fourth grade, the student's brain is so geared toward literacy that not to teach reading seems absurd.

The result is that we have sixth-grade students who have been studying English for over three years yet still neither spell nor speak, can't understand simple commands like "stand up" or "turn to page 5," and have no chance of truly speaking English.

There are exceptions, of course. The exceptions are the students who study reading and writing at academies after school.

Over the Hump

Well, I'm well past my three-month depression now. I stopped being
angry at every little thing some time last week. My depression,
however, was replaced with something else that I get every once in a
while in Asia -- food poisoning.

I grew up in a very clean environment in North America. Even with all
the hygiene there, I still managed to get sick fairly often. I guess
my immune system just isn't as strong as some people's. Combine the
weaker immune system with a million kinds of Asian bacteria and
viruses which my body has never encountered, and you get food
poisoning or some other major illness a few times a year.

I try not to miss work over these because they aren't really
contagious to Asians, but Friday was a different matter. I can't teach
with diarrhea and vomiting. In fact, I could barely stand up on
Friday.

I'm happy that I had a million different vaccines while I was in the
U.S. Army. Because I was with Special Forces, I traveled to Asia often
and received vaccinations for most of the really bad diseases here:
yellow fever, dengue fever, typhoid, tuberculosis, and many others. I
had three vaccination boks full of the vaccine stamps.

None of the vaccines stop the random Asian virus or bacterium, though.
Those guys just walk on through my immune system like they had a
security pass for unlimited access to my body.

All this means that I need to be very careful about what I eat. I used
to be reckless, going to anywhere in China, Thailand, or Laos and
eating anything off the street. I did that until I had gotten deathly
ill two or three times. Now, I'm much more careful about where and
what I eat.

If the food has been boiled or fried, I'm generally safe, but raw and
rare food scares me here. I stay away from shellfish, innards like
liver and brains, and blood because those things spoil so quickly. I
do what I can to look at how the food is handled in the kitchen. I try
to cook my own food as often as possible.

Even though I was careful, I think I got food poisoning from a local
restaurant whose name I won't mention. They are generally very clean
and probably just made a little mistake somewhere. I may not eat there
for a little while, though.

Another Mistake

I upset Mi Sook and many of the tecahers in my department by teaching over them last week. Today, when I taught during her class, I didn't give her enough time. It was the same issue with Hye Yeong's class. I just kind of took it from her. I knew that she was upset, but I didn't care because she was too sick and couldn't teach at all.

The teachers are apparently thinking that they are losing face in front of the students or something. That's my guess.

Anyway, I need to back off. If I just stop caring, then it will be OK. I will just stand and wait for my turn. It doesn't matter. I'll just do my job and get paid.

I knew I was doing it, but they are so weak about it and back off immediately because they aren't confident about what they are doing that I thought it was OK.

Except Hye Yeong.I knew about her.

I'll just forget it, stand in class, and try not to look bored.The real problem is
that the Korean teachers don't feel like they are teaching when I'm there and vice versa. We think about ourselves too much.
I say to myself, "I'm just standing here, doing nothing for twenty minutes."
Mi Sook said "I feel like 'Why am I in this room?'"
and that's normally how I feel. Mr. Park didn't complain, but he just GIVES me his class every time and wanders around. I think he prefers it, but I can never be sure. I try to be student centered, anyway which means LESS teacher time for both of us.

We agreed to talk more about the class before it starts. Right now she just kind of gives me the book and says "We're doing these three sections" so I have no idea what part she wants me to play. I don't want to step on her toes.

Anyway, I need to go brush my teeth, then I am going to try to apologize to the individual teachers.
I'm wrong.
Not following the rules.
I hate the rules but that's what they are.
Have to follow them.
Just have to hold myself back.

Teaching English Like Science or History

I was going to call this entry "Language Teaching and Language Learning vs. Language Acquisition," but I decided on a simpler, easier to understand title.

Part of my adjustment to the school has been dealing with the change in teaching style. For years I have been trying to teach language in ways that have been proven to be effective. Generally that means that I've need to avoid being "a teacher" as much as I can. Instead, I've focused on motivating students, giving lots of comprehensible input,
lowering stress, and creating opportunities for real communication.

Motivating Students

When I was a linguist in the U.S., I was trained in how to study
languages. Our courses were intense and had 60-70% failure rates.
Statistics on students who passed the courses showed that they were
motivated while the students who failed were not. The number on
correlating factor for success in language programs was motivation: it
was more important than curriculum, teaching method, or even the
ability of the teacher in the language being taught.

My first priority in a language classroom is, therefore, to motivate
my students. The students who are motivated will pass, and those who
aren't won't. Different students have different motivations, of
course: Some want the approval of their teacher, some want to prove
themselves in the eyes of their peers, and some have more private
motivations. I am pretty good at finding my students' hot button,
which is the main reason that I have been successful at language
teaching. If a student needs more challenge, I give it to him or her.
If the student needs someone to appreciate him or her, I'm there. It
is exhausting work.

Sadly, most of what we do in class is not motivating for the student.
Twenty minutes of "Listen and Repeat" followed by memorizing an
incomprehensible role play does nothing to make the students want to
speak English.

Comprehensible Input

According to modern models of how the language center of the brain
works, language is acquired, not learned. The traditional model of
teach, drill, and exercise is not particularly effective in getting
students to really use the language.

Stephen Krashen's 1981 publication on comprehensible input shined a
light on how the language center works:

1) Listening or reading which is slightly above the level of the
student allows him or her to use contextual clues to learn new
vocabulary and grammar;

2) Authentic material presents the students with realistic use of
vocabulary, grammar, and word co-location;

3) Engaging material keeps the student interested and motivates him or
her to try to understand; and

4) Comprehension comes before production.

A typical, effective unit spread over four classes would start with
listening and reading on a topic which is familiar and interesting to
the students, from which the students can extract the target
structures and vocabulary. Receptive activities (with correction)
through the first two days would help the students absorb (acquire)
the language. Topics would vary and include many kinds of language
already studied. The final two lessons would move into productive
activities, emphasizing subjects which the students want to write or
talk about. This means that the student has a good amount of freedom
in choosing (sub-)topic and method of presentation. The third class
period would use a shorter, simpler topic than the final class for the
unit.

As you can guess, we don't do that, either. We have listening which is
either too easy or too difficult for the students. Mutli-level classes
don't help the situation, but many of the topics are too difficult
even for middle school students. The material is boring and
unrealistic. We rush into production from the first class.

Lowering Stress

Stress is a large factor in whether a student acquires language or
not. The greater the stress, the less is absorbed. Shrum and Gilsan
list the most stressful activities as:

1. Read silently to self
2. Repeat as a class
3. Writing homework
4. Book exercises
5. Group work
6. Projects
7. Team games
8. Repeat individually
9. Open, free discussion
10. Interviews

Medium stress activities are:

1. Pair work in preparing a skit
2. Read aloud
3. Listening exercises with written component
4. Speaking one-on-one with instructor
5. In-class writing

Standing in front of the class giving a presentation is, predictably,
nowhere on this list.

Comprehension Before Production

Well, you can guess that we don't do this, either. We rush to
production on the first day, introducing the vocabulary for the unit
and playing "Listen and Repeat" with incomprehensible vocabulary and
pair work, expecting the student to pay attention when they can
understand nothing about what's going on.

Conclusion

Weather is a good, recent example of a failed unit we did. "How's the
weather?" is a common phrase taught in older language books, but is
unrealistic and offers no interest to the students. Have you ever been
in a room and asked someone else how the weather is today? Discussing
the weather is common, but asking about it isn't. Focusing on
discussing the differences in weather between countries, cities, and
seasons would be a more engaging topic. Broadening the discussion to
activities and food during different weather conditions will make it
more interesting. Bringing in what students are studying about weather
in science class (with a much simpler set of vocabulary and syntax)
will make the topic relevant to the student. Using geography in the
class would also be easy.

I'm not blaming the teachers. They are good teachers and moved to this
position because the administration trusts them to teach well. I don't
want to insult them.

I made a mistake last week when I was talking to the teachers and
discovered that they had all just begun teaching language. "Now I
understand," I said. I think that I hurt Mi Sook's feelings. I didn't
mean to. The truth is, though, that teaching language is different
than teaching science or history. The methodology is almost reversed.
I understood why our classes were so much like math or morality:
that's what the teachers were trained in.

We should really have a language teaching course for the department.

Bad Day

OK. I think I just screwed up. I didn't do anything out of character.
I acted the same way I've acted hundreds of times in the last seven
years, but I think I over-stepped my power here at Hogye ES. We'll see
if there's a meeting with the principal in the next couple of days
....

This is the story. While I was putting students into groups, one girl
refused. She wouldn't participate in any activity, and she made that
clear. I tried to encourage her, but it didn't make a difference. I
warned her. She didn't talk: she just shook her head. I took her hand
and tried to lead her. She wouldn't go.

I'm not concerned whether new students are good at English or not. I
never provide special treatment to above-average students. I simply
expect all students to try -- to make an effort. I don't allow
students to opt out of activities they don't like. If a student is
sick, he or she needs to go to the nurse or go home. Otherwise, he or
she needs to participate in class, at least minimally.

She was not going to do that, so I needed to take her outside. I don't
chastise or embarrass student in front of their friends. She refused
to go outside. At this point, there was a conflict about authority. I
don't relinquish control over my classroom. Never. I didn't want to
touch her because she is a nearly adolescent girl, so I picked her up
along with her chair and carried her outside.

That really upset her. Apparently, though, she already hates English
and doesn't want to be in my class. I don't know why this is, but it
could be a personality conflict with me. It was certainly in effect
before today, but I believe that it's only gotten worse at this point.

The Three-month Wall

I had intended to write about language learning vs. language
acquisition this week, but something much more important has happened
this week and has caused me to change my plan.

Long before I was ever a teacher, I was a linguist who came to Asia
regularly as part of my job. During my training, I was told about the
three-month wall. During the period after World War II and the Korea
War (the American side of it, anyway), the Peace Corp sent thousands
of doctors and engineers into under-developed parts of the world in
order to help with modernization and health issues. The Corp found
that it lost many volunteers after only three months and began
training member how to get past that point. The training was simply
making volunteers aware of the psychology of the event.

The time before three months is an adjustment period. People are
learning to get along in new surroundings with new responsibilities.
They are too preoccupied with getting settled to be very annoyed at
their new life. They accept differences in culture and tradition as
curiosities or interesting peccadilloes. After the first three months,
though "the honeymoon is over." Suddenly, everything becomes annoying.
The mind realizes that all these curiosities are not going to go away.
The peccadilloes are permanent and seem to be major transgressions.
Depression follows quickly behind this realization. Anger often
accompanies the depression.

I've trained many new teachers about this problem and have been
through it several times myself. The first time it is experienced, it
is particularly difficult to get through. The first time in a
particular culture is also worse than succeeding times, and I've even
managed to delay the time out to six months once or twice for cultures
with which I'm familiar, but every three-month wall causes some level
of depression and distress.

I'm at three months right now, and I'm feeling dissatisfied. This is
not my first wall. This is not even the first time I've experienced it
in Korea. I know that it's natural: It will go away shortly. For the
moment, however, I force myself to come into work bored every day and
fight not to argue with a people who follow their traditions, not
mine. I try to realize that the problem lies with myself and not with
them. Understanding the fear and anger that occurs naturally is the
only reasonable way to deal with it. Two weeks should be enough to get
past this feeling and move into a regular relationship with this
country and my job.

I only wish Gale were here to be by my side during this time. Oh well,
it's not the first time I've gone through it alone: I'm sure it won't
be the last, either.

Wednesday is Volleyball Day

Volleyball is apparently the national sport of Korea. Schools
throughout the country take on afternoon a week for all the teachers
to play. People tell me that Masan school district is particularly
competitive and takes playing more seriously than other districts.

When I first arrived to Ho Gye E.S., on my first day, I was asked d
see me and shout for joy "how my volleyball was. They saw that I was
tall and immediately thought that I would spike well. What they didn't
know was that I don't do ball sports at all.

I was born nearly blind. I got my first pair of glasses at four years
old. I began wearing contacts at eight years old. I could never even
SEE the eye chart at the doctors office, and I certainly couldn't read
anything on it. My eyes were so bad that doctors would shout for joy,
"Oh! I've read about people like you, but I've never seen one!" The
only sport I could play growing up was competitive swimming, and I
still had trouble there because I couldn't see the wall.

Seven years ago, I had laser eye surgery to correct my bad vision. My
eyes hurt so much from contacts that I couldn't wear them anymore, so
I had thick glasses instead. The surgery helped me see normally
(20/40-20/50), but I can't really wear glasses for normal life because
of the way the doctor corrected me. The point is, I still don't see
well, and I never developed eye-hand coordination when I was young.
Translation: I suck at volleyball.If we were choosing teams, I'd be
one of the last standing alone, just like in my elementary school when
I was a child.

Most of the teachers at Ho Gye E.S. are still very nice and supportive
of me, even though I play like a geeky girl. Most. There are some men
who play very seriously, and I don't want to play with them. They look
at me like I'm useless -- like they hate me for missing the ball -- so
I try to avoid playing volleyball now whenever I can find an excuse,
just like several other people in the school who don't play well.
Geeks make good teachers but bad volleyball players.

These unsportsman-like men steal the ball from other players, running
across the court to get balls that weren't theirs because they don't
trust the people whose balls they are. Last week, I watched a man
shove an older woman down onto the hard wood. She hit her head and
passed out for a moment. Professional athlete who act like that are
suspended from the sport.

This is a team-building exercise. It should bring the school together,
not mimic the social atmosphere of high school. Someone should tell
that to these men.

E-mail test

Test test

The Ins and Outs of Korean Society

I once had a friend who describe being a foreigner in Korea this way: "In Korean culture, you are either in the circle or out. People in the circle of family and friends are very important, and the people outside the circle don't matter at all. As a foreigner, you can never be in the circle."

I didn't know that when I first arrived in Korea three years ago. I didn't understand why no one talked to me at work for two months. I felt like I was being hazed and had to get through the test in order to be accepted. Once people opened up to me, I felt like I had Korean friends, but it was all an illusion because the moment they should have shown loyalty, they sided against me. They pushed me out even though it was obvious that I had done everything I could to do my job well and be loyal to them. They sided with a person who had stabbed them all in the back repeatedly because that person was Korean and I was not. I gave my life to my boss at the last job, made her a lot of money, increased her enrollment by 50%, helped her daughter get into the finest high school, and paid for their new house, and she cheated and lied to me. Yes, I'm upset and bitter about it.

I'm in limbo at my new school. The teachers at Ho Gye were nice to me from the moment I came. Everyone worked hard to help me adjust to the area and provide for me. I do what I can to help as many students as possible. Still, there is no chat in the English teachers' room. Although I am willing to help on a lot of subjects, especially things like grammar explanation or proofreading, I'm not given any of those tasks. The circle of teachers would rather debate among themselves whether something is correct than ask me.

So I have free time. Lots of it. I try to keep myself busy by working on my books, but I worry that they think I am not working hard enough. If I knew how I could help them, I would.

Background

I've been asked to describe how I adjust to life and work in Korea. Since I've finished three years in this country already, I think it's fair to talk about my background, how that affects my lifestyle in Korea, and what adjustments I'd made before I came to Ho Gye Elementary School.

I've been teaching in Asia for seven years, pretty much straight. That's a long time to be away from America. Before that, I spent a fair amount of time living and working in Asia in another field, and I grew up in Hawaii, a very Asian-influenced area. I was very familiar with Korean food and knew a few words of Korean before I ever came here. In fact, by best friend in middle school was half Korean and his grandmother cooked for me all the time, speaking to me in Korean as she served me.

I also learned a lot about other Asian cultures from living in Hawaii. My best friend in high school was of Chinese ancestry with his family being very Chinese. I studied Chinese in high school. I went to Beijing as an exchange student. Korea is not China, but some social and linguistic elements match up fairly well. I still get by some of the time by reading the Chinese characters instead of the Korean.

Before I was a teacher, I was a linguist specializing in Asian languages. I know four non-roman alphabets (plus Greek, so I guess that's five). I lived and visited many countries where no English was spoken. I studied languages in immersion-like settings. I'm used to using everything I know about culture and language with contextual clues in order to understand what's happening around me.

All this leads up to the point when I started working in Korea. I spent a couple of days studying the alphabet (that's about all it takes) and some simple survival skills before I stepped on a plane. It didn't make me feel strange: In fact, it was quite normal for me. My first two and a half years in Korea were spent in a small town where there was no English writing and no one other than a couple of teachers at my little school and a foreigner or two spoke any English whatsoever, so when I was asked during the interview for my current job whether being in a small town bothered me, I just responded that it was normal and I didn't have any problems. That is one area of stress which most new teachers have, but I have enough experience to deal with it happily.

Another area where foreigners often have trouble is in feeling isolated. They spend all day with no one to speak English to, then go home to an empty apartment and watch Korean TV. They feel they have no one. I'm lucky that I have Gale. We get along perfectly twenty-nine days a month and seem to know everything about each other.

My next writing will be about the exclusivity of Korean culture.

Purpose of the Blog

I am creating this blog at the request of Baek Hyeon Hui of Ho Gye Elementary School in support of her graduate study. I will be writing about my adjustments to Korean culture, work standards, and the atmosphere at the school. The English will be simpler than usual because Hyeon Hui is a second-language speaker. Wish me luck. I'll try not to be too negative.